It's better this way

Yes, this is the way it's supposed to be. I like this. Life has just kind of come to a calm stop. I'm really enjyoying the serenity of it all. The world came to a stand still, people falling into the appropriate places, gone with the right people. I don't mind being a loner, it kind of suits me actually. I like absorbing all of the feeling, not actually experiencing what they're so in love with. It amuses me to watch people do their regular activities. The smirk out of the corners of their mouths, the fleeting glances to their lovers across the room, or in Drake and Jordans case, the kiss in the hall that lasts fifteen more seconds than it's supposed to. I wish I could document all of these moments, just list them for everyone to see. But it would take so long I'd miss 15,000 more of them. I can see myself just being the quiet one in the back of the room that sits and observes every movement in the room. I'll just lay around, babysit some, then come July I'm off. I like that people have already begun to see me as an object more than a person. As dehumanizing as that sounds, I realize that there are tons of better things to do than sit with me. Because the truth is, I don't like to talk much. I do, because people get antsy and bored when all they do is sit with a person for three hours without a word spoken, but if I could, I really would just sit there for three hours. Maybe I wasn't supposed to be a person, not really, this is going to sound completely insane, but what if I was supposed to be an element... like wind. Just filling the gaps whenever I saw fit. Whenever people needed me, I'd just envelope myself around their being, never letting go. I should like that.